Some interesting things..

Online today I found some (at least what I thought to be) really interesting articles and such about TFA. Just thought that I would share.

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124061253951954349.html

http://blog.nola.com/reneepeck/2009/03/unexpected_things_can_happen_w.html

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=58111303066&ref=mf

I really hope that last link to the video works -- I finally got more information about what institute will be like.


I also really like the quote for today:

"I know God will not give me anything I cannot handle. I just wish that He did not trust me so much." -- Mother Teresa

That is a feeling I have had a lot lately. You could also say that I wish that TFA didn't trust me so much! Hopefully, I wont let anyone down! It's getting closer and closer.. and more and more real..

I passed!!!!

GACE Special Ed General Curriculum -- TAKE THAT!!!

I don't know how, I'm fairly suprised, but apparently everyone felt as ill-prepared as I did in March. I passed both of my General tests!! I'm still somewhat in shock. I guess studying on the cruise ship really helped!

So thats another notch to check off on my "Becoming a Teacher" To-Do List! Next is.. graduate! Which is coming up so quickly I can hardly believe it.

Official countdown (I'm not sure what makes it official...)
Days until my last final = 9!
Days until graduation = 12!
Days until regional induction = 36!
Days until Institute = 41!
Days until school = 105!!!!!!!

I know some of those are silly to already be thinking about, but it wasn't too long ago that graduation was months away, and now its only a few days away. It's hard to believe that so much hard work is about to pay off. And so much hard work hasn't even begun yet. I need to get back to my TFA pre-institute work, unfortunately finals are getting in the way right now. Nine more days and then I'll be able to completely devote myself to TFA.

Holy cow... this is really happening!!!!

I have begun my pre-institute work that I have to complete before I get to Atlanta in June. I have eight different lessons I have to work on, and each requires written responses from me. I will most likely post those on here so that I can not only keep up with them but also so that I can keep track of my progress. Today, I began my first reading, "Teaching as Leaders: Ms. Lora's Story." There are many things that I can comment on so far about what I have read of her experiences, but this one struck me the most so far. Here is an excerpt which discusses a phone call she had with her father after her first day of school:

And every time he did it, she smiled too. They both understood that by calling her “Ms. Lora,” Aurora’s father was lightly teasing her but also signaling his approval of her decision, and his disapproval of all of those who thought the idea was crazy.

Ms. Lora could not count the number of strange looks she received—ranging from the merely quizzical to the blatantly disapproving—when she told friends, relatives, colleagues, professors, and employers that she was going to teach. The idea that Aurora should use her own academic achievement and budding leadership skills to work toward raising others’ seemed absurd to many, and actively distasteful to some. “Have you thought about law school?” “Or grad school?” “Didn’t you want to be a doctor?” “But you can do anything you want to do. . .” Ms. Lora had endured the subtle and not-so-subtle disapproval of her decisions, telling herself that those short-sighted, but supposedly well-intended, comments only further validated her decision. Her father’s smile-laced “Ms. Lora” was a welcome reassurance that she had made the right decision.

I think it is interesting what different experiences she and I had upon making the decision for TFA. Of course, my parents worry about me being in an unsafe area or moving to a new place, but no one ever doubted me being a teacher. I don't know how I would have gotten this far, or how I would get through the next two years, if I didn't have so much support: from my family, my friends, Zach, the camp staff, everyone. I have no idea what I will do after my two year commitment, but it is certainly nice to know that I have such a huge support system to get me through this step and every other step in my life.

done with my test!

So this post has taken me a while to finish, but I have been trying to organize all my thoughts on this.

Saturday I took my certification test for Special Education, the General Curriculum. The two tests were only my first round -- once I know where I am working and a more specific idea of my teaching assignment I will then take my specific tests. The test was quite a frustrating experience. First, I don't remember the last time that I studied so hard for something. Unfortunately, the book that is meant to be a study guide is poorly written and was not at all an adequate preparation for the test. I am hoping that my knowledge from my psychology classes were enough of a compensation of information. I am also hoping that everyone else taking it felt as poorly prepared as I did. I do not mean to be bitter, I am just frustrated and will be beyond embarrassed if I fail my first certification test. That is not the impression I would like to give TFA.

I get more and more honored by my selection to the TFA Corps the more I learn about it. Someone recently told me that their acceptance rate is about 13%. WOW! I have also discovered, as I learn more about my other corps members, that I am a part of a very accomplished group. Many of the other Atlanta Corps members come from Ivy League schools and are significant leaders on their campuses, in various organizations. At times, I am very overwhelmed by the responsibilities I have as a member of this group.

I am also frequently overwhelmed by the responsibilities I have as a teacher and specifically as a special education teacher. I am struggling to constantly remind myself that God has gotten me this far, and that he will continue to help me through this. I also have to remind myself that TFA would not have chosen me for this if they didn't think that I could handle it. I need a better way to calm myself down. I need a better way to let go of things and trust. I can't have a plan for everything. I can't always have the answer or any answer. I am so excited about my future and I have to get better at focusing on that part, and the excitement of new challenges, and not be so concerned with all the things that I don't know and that I am afraid of.

"To live in fear is not to live at all." This was just said on the tv as I am finishing this up. Thanks again, God, for reminding me of your presence even in the midst of Desperate Housewives =)